“You have a nodule in your lung.” my doctor commented after a routine chest x-ray revealed a shadow. “Not to worry though, many people have scar tissue in their lungs.” Thus began a eight month journey that I had never expected at the beginning of 2018. Needless to say, I was somewhat anxious but I … More I’m Baaaaaaaaack!
Right now as I sit in this cafe, a multitude of feelings stir inside me I can physically sense them, and there is much in conflict. Below are a few of the more persistent. Anxiety… because almost nothing in my existence is as I imagined it to be. Truth be told, I never really … More Where I am
Do you know what it feels like to not to know who you are? Do you know what it feels like to live in fear of being discovered, of being wrong, of not measuring up to standards set by society? I do. I subjected myself to the whim of everyone. Yet, I was a failure … More Lost
There is an idiom that is still popular today. “Sticks and stones may break my bones but names will never hurt me.” I cannot number the times I have heard this. But it is not true. Names, words, can and do hurt. In fact they can destroy a person emotionally, spiritually, psychologically, and in … More Words
Sadness, anger, doubt, loneliness, frustration, determination, failure, more failure, fear (much fear), pepper most of my entries. I have to admit I was somewhat taken aback at the depth of sadness weaving its way through some of my entries. … More My Journal
As I have traveled this faith journey, I have made some discoveries about myself. Among them has been the realization that I have made choices that have not always been in my best interest, and I have made other choices to protect my fragile heart and ego. I have made choices that have manipulated others … More Hard Choices.
In 2016 I will have been out of high school for 40 years. Yet in spite of the decades that have seemingly flew by, the residual effects of those years continue to manifest themselves in my life. As I had mentioned last time, fear has been a lifelong companion. It has colored relationships, work, education, … More Bullied Into The Wilderness